​Hello, I’m a compulsive overeater and food addict. I started this blog a year ago and told myself I’d do an update each month. I lasted about a month, which is pretty typical for me, especially when I’m not in recovery! 
 
I spent the best part of last year “off the waggon” and binge eating. I initially worked the steps, but then gave up. Why? I guess I figured that once I’d lost the weight, I’d be able to keep it off without doing any of the work. I also thought I could get away with eating foods on my abstinence list. That wasn’t the case. I took one, then another, and then another bite of a food on my abstinence list, and the rest was a painful history. A year later, and 60lb heavier, I’ve learned my lesson! 
 
Since the end of January, I’ve managed to get back “on the waggon” by working the steps and going to meetings. It was incredibly hard at first, but people kept telling me to go to meetings, which I did, and I kept coming back. It took some time, but I now feel part of something again, and I’m now working on my recovery every day. The weight is slowly coming off, which is great. But I’m feeling serenity again, something that is more important to me than the weight loss now. 
 
In my first blog, I did an open invitation for those recovering from compulsive eating and/or compulsive food behaviours to send me their blog ideas by emailing [email protected]. That open invitation still stands!  
 
If you’re recovering from compulsive eating and/or compulsive food behaviours by working the Twelve Steps, I encourage you to contribute to this blog by sharing your experience, strength, and hope to those still suffering. You can remain anonymous or state your first name – it’s up to you. Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities (Tradition Twelve).
 
To all those who have contributed to this blog so far, thank you. I endeavor to provide more updates, more often, and welcome your ongoing support. Writing is one of the tools I’m using for my own personal recovery. Also, providing service, which is what I see this blog is hopefully doing – reaching out to fellow sufferers adds to the quality of my own recovery – and I hope yours too! 

Hello I am a recovering compulsive overeater and food addict.

This morning I was listening to a podcast on the forward to the 1st Edition of the Big Book. The podcaster was focusing on the purpose of the Big Book and the importance of following directions. Ah, directions, it’s something I continue to wrestle with, given my ego and belief around my status as special snowflake in recovery.

In the Big Book we are asked to pay particular attention to italics, so when Bill wrote “precisely how we recovered” I need to take him at his word. Precisely. I need to follow the simple set of directions, as outlined in the book, precisely. And yet, I want to show up in working my steps as
a negotiator. Precisely, really? Is there no room for creativity?

This idea of precisely had me thinking about a conversation I overhead between two of my favourite nieces. One is a cook and the other a baker. Actually, they are so much more than bakers and cooks and I have the privilege of watching them grow in their relationship with each
other. Notice I am digressing from my point about precision. Back to their overheard conversation, the cook said something like “I dislike baking, it’s so rigid” and the baker responded with “Sister it’s a science, it has to be exact, it’s based on chemical reactions, you can’t substitute ingredients like you do in cooking”

And there it is, I want to substitute, be creative, I want to cook up my own program. The
directions are simple, if I want what the first 100 had, I must do what they did. So, the simple
instructions I need to follow when it comes to my recovery are; be a baker, do not be a cook.
Because, if I follow the recipe as outlined in the big book, I am guaranteed recovery.